I... think I love her.

TACO: blah blah blah

WIFEZILLA: [makes fun of Taco]

TACO: Are you making fun of me?

WIFEZILLA: Noooooooo.

TACO: Are you making fun of me again?

WIFEZILLA: ...yes.

xjc, yer yeller.

I love this error message so much it hurts.

OMG Me Too

Yesterday, we were driving to my folks' house for Sunday dinner and witnessed... well, I'm not sure exactly what we witnessed. As we were heading south out of Raleigh, a rather rotund man -- and one who made my fish-white belly look tan, I soon found out -- suddenly windmilled his duffel bag into the ground and ripped his shirt off, then went apeshit on one of those markers the phone company uses to indicate underground cables. Damn if he didn't hate that thing. He punched it a few times, stomped it into the ground, then grabbed it a bear hug and apparently tried to suplex it. It was... yeah. I tried to fish my cell phone out of my pocket so I could share with you guys, but I wasn't fast enough. Ah, well.

This morning, on my way into work, I was behind an SUV with the personalized plate: "LUV GINA." I waved and yelled, "OMG, ME TOO!" but I don't think they heard me. Again with the too slow cell phone. I need to keep the damn thing on the dash when I drive.

Almost called in sick today, but manned up and went in. Work was somewhat less craptacular than I expected.

My laptop came back in today. Looks like Apple fixed it all up. The LCD had some scuff marks on it when I bought it that I was never able to remove. They either knew how to clean them or put a new LCD in. Either way, I'm quite pleased. They also gave me a new battery even though it technically wasn't covered. The old one was beginning to discharge a little quicker (I hear it's a common problem in hard drives of a certain age [I hate me, Larry])... not too bad yet, but I was looking at replacing it soon. Free is always good. Very happy overall with my experience so far. Yay.

Tired of wrestling with my fantasy hockey settings. Dropped my goalie a week ago and can't get it to give me a new one. The docs are sparse, hard to find, and shitacular. Think I'm giving up on playing. Deleted the bookmark off all my computers today.

My arthritis has been a bit worse lately. Shit.

Back to reinstalling crap on my newly-returned laptop. World of Warcraft should be done installing any week now.

It's obvious, really.

I respectfully disagree, sirs.

The threshholds we cross.

Today I got to drop the "if you're too sick to stay at school, you're too sick to get out of bed for the rest of the day" line I so hated in my own childhood. It's the kind of periodic bastardy that makes being a parent fun, but also that makes you old.

And it lifts you up...

• Zombieland was awesome. So much yay.
• There's hope for my laptop. So much yay.
• Out of respect for the person's privacy, I'll keep my mouth shut, but I didn't promise not to go whoring for good vibes, so heads up, do whatever it is you do: cross fingers, pray, sacrifice an animal, masturbate for peace, punch a moron... whatever higher powers are currently at large will fill in the blank, I'm sure.
• Friend of ours has a very sick daughter (I've mentioned her before). Her daughter had a seizure today, during which I'm told she turned rather purple. The doctors offer no explanations for the seizure, citing normal readings all around.
• Same friend's sister has two children who are very poorly cared for. They both need medical attention due to the neglect (though they're doing rather better recently since our friend has been keeping them while their mother is in the damn county jail), and they suspect abuse. She tried to get help for the kids from social services today, but was ignored and hurried out of the building because "times are tough for everyone, I'm sure it's poverty, not neglect."
• If I ever run into my high school guidance counsellor, I am going to kick her ass for not telling me about this.
  
• There's a guy in California I got roped into working with a few years ago. To put it kindly, he's difficult, and I generally get little in the way of support other than "make it go away" whenever he comes a-callin'. He sent a very pointed, very nasty email out last week and copied half the damn world on it. I sent a rather pointed, more polite email back to the whole list and eventually got a backhanded apology. Momentarily got some backup that evaporated with the faux-apology. Sigh. Can't take much more of this.
  
• Got an interview at Deutsche Bank. The recruiter informs me that the hiring manager "is a real ballbuster." I don't mind intense and/or difficult interviews (they reflect well on the quality of the team I'm considering joining), but I don't respond well to dickheads who are abusive during interviews. We'll see which he is tomorrow, I guess. Bets on whether I slip and call them Douche Bank?
• Managed to master my low self-esteem long enough to mail my latest short story off to a magazine yesterday. The headrush that hit me when the envelope was irretrievably out of my hands just about brought me to my knees. Doing better now (though I suspect another nasty attack when the return envelope does its boomerang act into my mailbox). Need to start working on a new one now. Not really feeling the ones I have a grip on. Need to bullshit with somebody about one of the ones I'm more interested in doing but haven't fleshed out yet. Where's Coyote?
• I will shoot you SO HARD!
• Double tap.
• ...then it puts you down / and it feeds you life / then it lets you drown / while it holds your heart / then it slowly tears you apart

Of undead obsessions and birthdays

I'm very fortunate to have a family that humors my obsessions. Below is a photo of the early birthday gift my father-in-law (who rocks harder than anybody else's father-in-law. My word is law) gave me this evening.