Booyah. Got the /mom.

TACO: Stop restoring my faith in humanity, damn it. I can't be a curmudgeon unless I hate my species.

BLUE: not all of us are assholes

TACO: You're messing with my worldview

BLUE: giving you a new paradigm... i'm not [jackass' name deleted], though.. i don't have art to go with it
BLUE: lmao

TACO: Maybe you could leverage some synergies to create an actionable paradigm?

BLUE: or maybe i could just put a boot in your keester and tell you not be a curmudgeon? :)

TACO: *shakefist*

BLUE: pfft
BLUE: unafraid

TACO: Gonna take my walker out in the front yard and yell at people to get the hell off my lawn

BLUE: uh huh
BLUE: take the hose with you
BLUE: lol

TACO: Man
TACO: Why's it always come down to hoes with you?

BLUE: lmao!
BLUE: /mom

TACO: Yay!

BLUE: yeah.. figures that would be a /win for ya

He's got a bead on you.

Kidzookie had his first brush with internet porn.

He's been playing online games and managed to get the computer infected, and it started throwing pornographic popups at him.

There's a scan running on the machine now, and in the meantime, we're having on-again, off-again talks about what happened to see if he has any questions that need answering.

And it was during one of these conversations, just after telling me about a popup of "a lady with no clothes on sitting on a pizza," that he told me, "I don't think that site is for kids. I think it's for teenagers. Or maybe Steve."

Damn kids and their intertubes.

KIDZOOKIE: Daddy?

TACO: What?

KIDZOOKIE: Daddy?

TACO: What?

KIDZOOKIE: Daddyyyyyyyyyy?

TACO: What?

KIDZOOKIE: DAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAADDYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY?

TACO: WHAT!?

KIDZOOKIE: We're in a restaurant, Daaaaaaaddyyyyyyyyy.

Wherein she sets my priorities in order

WIFEZILLA: [digs through Taco's change bowl] Can I borrow some change?

TACO: Sure.

WIFEZILLA: Another Canadian dime. Damn it, you're where I keep getting them!

TACO: Alackaday, my secret is out! I'm having an affair with my sexy Canadian man!

WIFEZILLA: Lovely.

TACO: He pays for blowjobs with Canadian dimes.

WIFEZILLA: You need to start charging more.

We have traveled this way before and there is much to be learned.

Netflix has Cosmos available for online streaming. I've been watching an episode a night for a few nights now. I forgot how much I love this series (and Carl Sagan).

Upgraded my main PC at work to Ubuntu 9.10 today. Our network sucks balls so it didn't finish until a few minutes before I had to leave, so I haven't put it through its paces yet. It's pretty, though.

Today marks one month since I submitted my short story to Analog. The Black Hole indicates a turnaround time of around 40 days for rejections from Analog, so I guess I don't need to be panicking for another two weeks, give or take. Figures the one thing I wouldn't procrastinate on would be panic attacks.

Speaking of panic attacks, never got the promised call from RecruiterLady today. Knew I shouldn't have said anything aloud. Done gone and jinxed m'self. Damn it.

Wifezilla and Girlzookie met me for lunch today. During lunch, Girlzookie pointed out a group of highway patrolmen eating a few tables down from us and told me, "You can't say any bad words, Dad. The cops are here."

I don't care if she plucked puppies from god's ass.

Picked up The Plan today. Just finished watching it (and the extras). Awesome. It's almost like watching a behind-the-scenes flick on the actual plot. Maybe that makes no sense. Lots of fun, though, good story, and very good ending. I'm jonesing for BSG again. May have to binge on the whole series now.

Don't want to jinx myself, but I think the interviews are going well. Getting more excited with every iteration, which is something of a novelty for me. Supposed to schedule the next one on Monday. Woo.

Wifezilla wanted hot wings so we went to Hooters for lunch today. Lunch at Hooters on Halloween is a Very Good Idea.

There was a guy two tables over dressed as Joker from The Dark Knight. This was the most elaborate Joker costume I've ever seen. It was convincing enough that I was hard pressed to even attempt to dissuade Kidzookie from his assertion that he was the real Joker. I tried to get the kids to go over and ask the guy why he was so serious, but they were afraid of him. Asking him if he wanted to see a magic trick was also a no-go. On the way out, however, Joker got up from his table and approached the kids, and gave each of them a playing card upon which the Joker's face had been scrawled over the normal array of diamonds, clubs, hearts, or spades.

Completely. Fucking. Awesome.

The kids are now even more convinced he was the real Joker. Who knew the real Joker ate at Hooters?

I stayed at home to hand out candy while Wifezilla took the kidzookies out trick-or-treating. We ran out of candy, which I figure is the mark of a good Halloween.

Sometimes the jokes don't land.

INTERVIEWER: So I apologize if this question is too easy or is insulting, but you'd be amazed by how many supposedly senior developers can't answer it.

TACO: Okay.

INTERVIEWER: Can you tell me what a static variable is?

TACO: Yeah, that's when you rub two programs against each other and variables from one build up on the surface of the other one, right?

CRICKETS: Chirp! Chirp!