I was trying to figure out something to post here, and finally decided to use that story to build an entry. And what the hell, I'm going to make (most of) them vague to confuse and tantalize anyone who cares. Which amounts to... hold on... carry the one... nobody.
So anyway, here's five apologies I owe people but never gave. Been carrying some of these around with me for better than half my life now. Wow. I don't even know how to get in touch with most of these people to give the apology, but what the fuck, I'm already going to hell for better reasons.
- Jessica: I'm sorry that I said what I said, and I'm even sorrier I said it where I said it. I was 14, and not really capable of empathy... not that it's any excuse. I thought it would be funny, because it was funny to me when you said those kinds of things in a different setting. I didn't realize how bad it would hurt your feelings until it was already out of my mouth. You were my best friend at the time, and continued to be my best friend for a long time after that, which is testament to how much you rock. You're still one of the best friends I've ever had. I'd never make you feel that way on purpose.
- Alyson: I'm sorry about the barf. In my defense, there were spiders. S. Plural. Christ.
- Patrick: I'm sorry about the porno magazines. I really thought they'd stop sending them to you before a whole year had gone by and your mail started getting forwarded to your mom's house. On the bright side, she stopped worrying about you being gay for a while.
- Suzie: I'm sorry, I really did forget the date of your show. I've never really been good with anything outside a regular schedule. I wish I had been there.
- Dr. Beaumier: I'm sorry I laughed at you so hard you had to go home and change clothes. In my defense, dude, you were wearing spandex cycling shorts with a dress shirt. What the fuck? Actually, fuck it, I don't owe you an apology... laughing long and hard is the correct response. Jackass.
9 comments:
Hmmm. I like this idea. I think I may steal it if i can think of 5 things obscure enough that nobody will understand what I am talking about. May have to be a work in progress.
Know what I love about that post? Every word is 100% true.
Fabulous. Fabulous! But I'm totally not stealing the idea. If I were to think about all the apologies I should make, I'd have to write a freakin' book.
Yeah, it was tough to bring it down to five. I owe a lot more apologies than that. I'd feel shitty about all the ones I didn't write, but then again, it's not as if the people I owe these to will ever actually read them. So they're essentially pointless anyway, I guess.
Not sure I said anything about actually feeling bad about not apologizing. heh heh. Eh, sometimes the point of something is to be pointless. Is that possible? To have a pointless point? Does it matter? Is it real? Where is there?
Can nihilists believe in nihilism?
All I can think about now is what you could have said to the first girl. That's just mean...
Hee hee
I'm imagining what type of porn you had sent, knowing you, I have a feeling his mom had plenty to worry about!
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