Monday, June 30, 2008

They call me Dr. Factoid

KIDZOOKIE: (referring to a Happy Meal toy) He's an insect, right?

TACO: Yep. You know what an insect is, right?

KIDZOOKIE: Yeah, like a bug.

TACO: Well, yeah, some bugs are insects, but not all of them. See, to be an insect...

KIDZOOKIE: Like ants?

TACO: Yeah, like ants. There's a few rules about insects.

KIDZOOKIE: Bugs have rules?

TACO: No, not that kind of rule. Criteria. How you know it's an insect. Insects have six legs...

KIDZOOKIE: Nuh-uh. Spiders don't have six legs.

TACO: Well, spiders aren't insects. They're arachnids. So are ticks and scorpions.

KIDZOOKIE: They're not insects?

TACO: No. Like I was saying, insects have six legs, and a body made of three sections...

KIDZOOKIE: Oh, the head, thorax and... uh... oh, abdomen!

TACO: ... how the crap did you know that?

KIDZOOKIE: I just did.

TACO: Okay, well, anyway, so you see how spiders aren't insects then.

KIDZOOKIE: How about worms?

TACO: What about worms?

KIDZOOKIE: They don't have any legs.

TACO: Well yeah. They're not insects.

KIDZOOKIE: My teacher says they're insects.

TACO: I think you must have misunderstood her.

KIDZOOKIE: No, she says they're insects.

TACO: She probably meant bugs. Some people call them bugs. 'Bug' is an imprecise term that encompasses...

KIDZOOKIE: Okay, Dr. Factoid.


Bluejeangirl said...

Ah ha ha!!! Seriously dude, you're screwed.

Karn said...

I like this kid. He is going to be fun. Ask him where rain comes from and see if he gives you the entire water cycle.

fett said...

Clearly this is another situation that could be solved with a Venn Diagram.

suyapi said...

Oh, yeah. You remember when you gave your parents hell? Yeah, their curse for you to get a kid just like you came back to haunt you.

Larriken said...


He'd just like you, dude. No use blaming Wifezilla. That's all you!!

We love the ZOOK!

Grimmstail said...

Thanks to this post (well, sort of) I have learned two important facts. 1) Scorpions are viviparous. 2) Little scorpions are called scorplings

Scorplings! I know! Could there be a cuter name? Must ... go ... hug ... scorpling ... cannot resist ... cute name.

Also, dugpw!

The Taco Prophet said...

I actually knew that scorpions are viviparous because of a short story they made us read in grade school. I can't remember what the short story was about now, but I was fascinated at the time to learn that they bore live young, and that, apparently, has stuck with me.

I didn't know their young are called scorplings. Yay! I learned!

I had an apartment with a scorpion infestation. That was decidedly less than fun.

Dugpw? Vas ist?

Bluejeangirl said...

Hey.. but what are worms?

Larriken said...

Annelids. See also Platyhelminthes and Nemotodes.

That Biology degree comes in handy now and again...


E. S. Collins said...

This is why I'm afraid to breed. What if my kid is just. Like. Me.


Grimmstail said...


Grimmstail said...

I should also point out that hmotfkoy. Not that I endorse that or anything.